Visage

What Am I??

Mirror? Or Water?

I reflect people, replicate actions

Flow with ‘em, echo their words.

Imitate art, and am transparent.

Put a shape on me and I gush through.

Mirror? Water? Water? Mirror? I may know not,

But ’ve learnt to delude myself and cruise.

Then why it all elapsed?

Is the mirror ripped? Or the water diluted?

Should I had been more specific? Identity crisis, Is it?

Oh, so it had come to pass,

And it was to ensue.. The Identity crisis..

Like water.. Eventually poured down to be something else!

Like mirror.. With no facade of its own!

BUZZ? Bee it!

“Relation?” “Naeh!” “Oh then Relations?” one of my friend asked me lately.

“Why, necessary?” I raised an eyebrow. “Why everything has to start or end with a name?”

“Because we all are F’ed up culturally!” It cracked him instantly.

“Obviously I was there, once or twice, but being friend!”

“No, you can’t have your own terms in any relationship, be it friendship or anything!”

The most hackneyed theory ‘Hence proved’ again! Still stale!

 All I’m interested to know is why these so called people can’t see my point of view for their so called “love”. Let’s confirm.

Receiving respect is one thing I crushingly respect. Art of talking grabs it all. One should unquestionably master it. Not everyone is an artist I agree, but you know speech isn’t rare either, don’t you?

To be an emotional tag which people carry along everywhere is certainly not me. Firstly I can’t pitter-patter whole day on cell phones. But I would love to hear cheesy stuffs. Secondly I admit that everyone has sentiments, but none can tie you emotionally until you want them to. Why to cling then?

I believe gestures in love are much more attractive, effective and valuable then words. Gone are the days when people used to sing Its only words, and words are all I have, to take your heart away. And for your self-respect, stop daydreaming while hitting online! Be genuine!

“Hey you look good! Can I get along?” as they say it, It’s actually more stupid than how it sounds here. This won’t even qualify you on pick-up lines. WTH for heaven’s sake people! Get over yourself!

Although being a complete narcissist, there are some things out of my understanding. If I were to lay people down by my hotness hypnosis, why am I not PAID to look good?

Intro-Spectacles

 Yesterday I was going through a quiz viz. “Which type of Woman are you?”

After a quick answer session the result popped up: 

 Lovely Lady

You are lovely and caring. You help others and spread out a lot of sympathy. Your life aim maybe is to serve the people. But your weakness is that you forget about yourself, your own needs. All your time is hold back for your friends and family. You are always there for people in trouble. Ready for any emergency. You make a lot of sacrifices just to be a good human. But every woman has her needs, her longings and a destiny. Don’t lose yourself in work or curing other people’s souls. You will have your own problems in your life. Another problem is that you don’t say your opinion when it’s right and important to say it. People trample onto your soul if you are always so kind and lovely and helpful. They will play on you. Though you should try to relax more and enjoy your life, you should not loose the gift that was given to you to help others. Not everyone is created this way… You are unique and rare!

– 

How cliché!

I am verily not the person depicted above! “I sacrifice a lot” Bleah!. I got no damned reason to act like that! And Hell I serve no good to people instead! Never in my earlier births as well!

My biggest strength is to keep wondering about myself 24X7! I’m forever and ever ready to shoot my opinions, whether raised or not! And as far as others are concerned, I give them no chance to cheat on me, but I can swear to swindle! Mind-games, Anybody? <Rolling eyes>

So does that mean these tests on a public domain don’t really make a point?

Well not always,, I went through another quiz “What is my best quality known to people?”:

Out-Going

Your best quality is out-going! People like you because you are fun to be around and no one ever knows what you will do next. Also you are not afraid to say or do whatever you want

Yaah!

That’s precise!! Pretty me!! <Batting eyelashes>

Of Confessions and more..

Oodles of thought over petty matters occupied me lately. Some undertakings, obligatory and inevitable both captured me instantaneously. As I sit to pen down today after so long, what can be more candid then my late realizations?  

My last few speeches, being acutely low context, were damn offensive, nay, no regrets.

Why is everyone moved by the wunderkinds? ‘Success’ is the most hackneyed word!

On a sober thought, although being an UPite (belonging from Uttar Pradesh), I never went for Kumbh ka Mela (Kumbh Festival).

My picture of a snap-gal is still incomplete! (I wanted to be clicked with LonelyPlanetImages)

Nevertheless, am still yearning for a new D90, the very first item of my To-buy list over past 2 years!

My dream place to photograph would be Paris? Spain? Cape Town, South Africa? Or it’s still out of this world!

But my dream place to shop is definitely Milan!

Why everyone needs a Future plan? I don’t know! I never wanted to be an SE and still I am, for months and for a year now!

Learning law as fun, but no Lawyers!

Year 08-09 ended with a lot of seen unseen changes in me. (Most cherished year till date)

I realized my biggest crush was actually love and lost it too.

My effortless moving-on time reduced to one single day!    

No episodic dreams over past 6 months or more. Change is dramatic indeed.

Regarding Money management am certainly not one of the wise decision makers.

It tickles while incubating the idea of opening a seafood terrace-restaurant by the beach-side.

It was astonishing to know that the (only) girl (in this world), my identical twin in thinking had undergone through the same series of mutations as I did. How can there be so much resemblance? Do Parallel lives exist?

My itchy feet still fancy a world stroll.

What is so funny about don’t-ask-don’t-tell jokes?

Guys can never express their love to the girl they really love.

I certainly am the Teenybopper of a seasoned age!

–

My writings do have a high fog index.

Look-Some One!

Last week I got a compliment.. Weird one indeed..  “Hey you look like Bipasha!”

“Who me? You got to be kidding me!” well actually, my misunderstood quote was: Does that mean I can get ‘John’? *Sigh* *Sigh*

“Yeah, You!  She has got pretty similar features like yours! Beautiful indeed!”

“Beauty, Me, and Bipasha??” .. ah certainly not.. I’m still the wide-eyed girl with a big chubby nose! Or rather, an elongated nose-bone!

But does this count? Is Beauty everything a lady desires? Ah! Well a guy might answer this better!  

Lately, I was chatting with one of my friends, who effortlessly tries to keep himself away from anything that has even slightest closeness to what we call “GIRLs”. Well, Instead of violating his privacy policy I would prefer to call ‘um Mr HIM!

“One of my friend is going to be hooked up with a Russian Lass soon!” while revealing a friend’s latest involvement!

“Cool! Lucky one!” Mr. HIM got li’l moved!

“Ain’t enough!! He himself thinks all of ‘em are too Booty-full with no brains!”

“That’s what makes them perfect”, he marked the statement here!

“Typical guy!!” ignoring the statuary saying!

“After all an Earthling!” as he elucidates the Hookup-theory more, “Two dumb can be together! One dumb and one smart can be together! But two smart? NO!! Simply NO!”

“And so you think you are smart?”

“I am dumb!”

“Ow how smart!!” I laughed at this irony!

“But I don’t take the odds of being with smart one! For smart ones realize soon about others dumbness. Unlike people of my kind.”

How elegant was that!! It took me no time to take in this cranial piece of thought!!  Well, truly enough, Superstar good looks are always welcome and even the most ‘no women’ men can’t resist that kind of beauty.

A recent article on much babbled ‘Beauty and Brains’ read:

Shhh and look pretty: First impressions aside, frankly just good looks can last you only till the first date, at the most. Unless of course, the guy is very clear about what he wants! But most men do get a little put off after a while, with someone who’s a disher but can’t make a sensible conversation.

Brainy no lookers: Hmm, now that sounds like a real challenge, at least till the point that your guy knows that you are super sharp. A smart sense of humor can sometimes replace good looks, but well, not always. But recent research suggests that men would rather prefer to spend time with a woman who’s not so great looking but can make great conversation.

–

Beauty over Brains or Brain over Beauty!! I will just say, to understand a ‘Beauty’ all you need is a handful of brain! And with the right amount of thought anything or everything can be portrayed beautifully!

Take my word! Have an Artist’s eye!

sHush!!

Sometimes I do believe that…

Some of the Best things in our life

Remained Best

Because they were never meant to be spoken!  

And time after time

I too have noticed that…

The deepest feelings only turn up in silence!

And                                                                                  

Nothing I never said ever did me any harm either!

–

So for a chance…

Practice a Quiescent Stance!

As Beauty lies in silence

no words!

Oh so me!!

All these years passed like a swinging sway at some place unknown, with each back rise, an abrupt downfall and after a comedown, a surprising up rise… yet the curls of change screw us hard, may there be a reason or none.

Amidst these, I lived my life around a picture, and I tried not to change inside out!

Yea, fantasized is the word solely defined for me. As per Sigmund Freud’s theory, my Id (the uncoordinated instinctual trends of my psyche) was also employed with the same Pleasure Principle.  In his words, the id wants whatever feels good at the time, with no consideration for the reality of the situation. Dreaming day and night of my illusions was my involuntary acquired behavioral pattern. As they say, “When the id wants something, nothing else is important.” So dreaming… uh… Dreams that conveyed something; dreams that put me into long paused thoughts; dreams that kissed me high; dreams that dimmed me out; dreams that made me murky at times; dreams that ripped me low.  I was lost in zillion such dreams that completely haunted my desires. Desires of a child; desires of a teen; and now the desires of a major.

In subsequent years, getting across people, I ripened my ego! A few namesake friends and I stood utterly preoccupied in me myself! Never annoyed about other’s say; could never care less for the selfish world, but only for the self.  Conversed with those with the blues and ending the talk with my elongated preaches. Yes… that’s an intended act. (Yea… I know… it’s…oh em gee!!)

In search of a comfort zone, I searched for an alter ego. And I found a Zilch! As living such unconsciously, the majority of my experiences, the underlying emotions, beliefs, feelings, impulses and anything that drives me are buried in my unconscious. While buried there, however, they continue to impact me dramatically.

That is why, at any given time, people are only aware of a very small part of what makes up my personality; most of what I am is buried and inaccessible.

 –

Comment: by Lifehouse: get my song…

And it’s all
To the wind
It’s all
In our heads

And we break
And we burn
And we turn it inside out
To take it back
To the start
And through the rise and falling apart
We discover who we are

Mirror me!!

Sometimes I just gaze at things that are so general, yet I act on them so unusually! As in the case of mirrors, well everyone likes them, then what is it that makes me like ‘em to such an extent that I gape ogle it totally!!? :-|

Is that the beauty of mirror that is so enchanting or is it some unseen voodoo around ‘em?? Then I jump on wondering what beauty actually is?? Beauty.. Beauty.. Beauty is eternity gazing at itself in a mirror!!

“Beauty is truth’s smile when she beholds her own face in a perfect mirror.”

-Rabindranath Tagore 

I Clicked Deeti

  glad that I had a camera and a mirror at the same time!

Yea.. I go crazy about mirrors, and then run for this never ending hunt for them in all odds! This fantasy of mine is even older than the Harry Potter’s trivia that mirrors can picture your future. Though my interest is in the future, because I’m going to spend rest of my life there. But still this is not why I gaze at ‘em. I never had an answer to this question before I was actually asked upon.

My friend once while shopping discovered my this hidden passion… as you know the malls today.. a mirror here and a mirror there.. and soon you see yourself everywhere! She got a bit dazed as my face go funny with my every look at mirror and each time this ads an infinitum to her laugh! She then asked me in aspiration of an upbeat response:

 ”Varsha, why do u do that every time you see a mirror??”

Well the truth is.. I’m highly self-obssessed right from the start and I continue even today, always liking myself. But I abruptly headed on saying

“I like to see someone who is very much like me and since its not possible that I find an exact being as alive as me, so I look at mirror to greet my alter ego thinking at least someone somewhere is this akin to me!”

a pause.. and a deep thought..and I went wordy again

“And you know what, I think the ability to delude yourself is an important survival tool.. eh??”  

Love Hate Attitude

 Life like a mirror reflects back to the thinker what he thinks into it.. 

What I actually meant was: We are the eternity and we are the mirror!

Ow, its not easy everytime that you find someone, who reflects you so well that you get a sure smile whenever you see ‘em next!! Someone who has got every insane gesture for all your simply sane acts!! Someone who has that very glare for your aura which can show you what you are actually capable of being!!

So next time you see the mirror.. mirror me if you can!!!

And I tell you its worth trying!!

 

now answer this: Who sees the human face correctly: the photographer, the mirror or the painter??  

 

Yello!

 

I’m all geared up for a new start here on wordpress!!

so do catch me up here from time to time!!

  

“rejuvenated”

This weblog will be more of a photoblog,

where each snap will define my words!!